Iron Man 3...the SPOILER-FILLED review...

Okay - you've had the weekend, and by now if you haven't seen it, you've most likely heard about it.

So here's my thoughts, views, opinions, what have yous chock-full of spoilers.

You've been warned...

The Good:

I've always thought RDJ was to Tony Stark what Sean Connery was to James Bond. While the role will be played by others for the next 40+ years, and over that time everyone will have a "favorite", RDJ played him first and to the hilt. He was excellent.

As for Tony Stark, the character had a clear developmental arc from where he was after The Avengers to where he is at the end of this film...

...but he gets the s#!t kicked out of him to get there.

He gains an armor, but loses his home..along with all the other armors we've seen up to this point (I'll get to the suits later.), and he spent most of the movie away from Pepper and Happy, which makes sense - because the tone of this film had three little words: Back to Basics.

We see Tony for who he is. Iron Man is a suit. An amazing technological feat - no question - but as I said before, when Tony isn't wearing the thing, it's just a big f**king paperweight. When he calls himself "The Mechanic" that's really who he is. Which is driven home throughout, every time we see the name tag that says "You know who I am".

Then he's hiding out in the garage, where he repairs Jarvis and the suit, while putting stuff together he bought at Home Depot or somewhere on his way to Miami to take down the Mandarin.

And finally, when he defeats Killian and tells Jarvis to activate the "Clean Slate", we see that Tony is back to his beginnings, and will probably get around to making a suit sometime down the road...after getting some sleep after having the remaining shrapnel removed from his chest.

Which - before anyone cries foul - happened in the books before he donned the Silver Centurion armor, so he can make more suits using the arc tech without wearing the arc tech...as seen by the twenty suits of armor flying around and the Iron Patriot armor.

Did anyone notice at the end of the film where the credits said "Tony Stark will return"?

Not Iron Man...Tony Stark will return.

That's damn bold.

Pepper Potts...played a tremendous part in this film.

Yeah, she wears the suit, but then gets kidnapped...and tortured...and given super powers through Extremis.

Holy...f**king...s#!t...

Her character totally changed. Instead of watching Tony from the sidelines, she can now fight beside him...
...and potentially kick his ass.

Like Tony said: "I've got nothin'"

I can't wait to see what happens to her next. This was a great decision, and I hope Gwyneth keeps portraying her, but if RDJ moves on, most likely she will too. I'm okay with that, as long as the character continues to appear in the MMU.

James Rhodes didn't grow as a character in this film, but proved that he's always got Tony's back.

Don Cheadle had some great scenes and one-liners, and worked off of RDJ beautifully.

His password is WARMACHINEROX? That's damn funny.

This Guy has come a looong way from The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert.

Killian is the perfect recurring villain for Tony in the MMU (much like Goldfinger is the quintessential Bond villain).

He's using biology against Tony's technology...don't think I didn't notice that.

He's also got some of the rival CEO military industrialist-ness of Justin Hammer in the books.

In fact, I can totally see him using Extremis (and other stuff) to create super-villains in the future.

Maybe even a potential super-hero <*cough*> Wonder Man <*cough*>?

Which leads me to...

The Bad:

This was..to me...a kick in the nuts.

Mandarin was hyped up for over a f**king year before the film came out. Now I wasn't expecting the ten rings to have the powers of their comic roots - an alien ship crashing into China, from the same planet as Fin Fang Foom, that Mandarin investigated and used to manufacture the rings - because that's a bit much.

They wanted Mandarin to instead be a terrorist leader in Afghanistan responsible for the guys that kidnapped Tony in the first place? Fine.

They chose Ben Kingsley to play him? Awesome!

But what we got in Iron Man 3 was SO...F**KING WRONG!!!!!

'Nuff Said.

The WTF?:

Merry Christmas Pepper...

The look of this armor threw me, but I grew to like it.

The modular aspect of it was awesome, and the "remote-controlled" thing works and may have a possible future appearance...say when Tony gets shot in the spine by a former lover and confined to a wheelchair...?

But my WTF? is more about the other armors.

We see them for all of like five minutes. There's twenty of them, all with different abilities...strengths...and apparently names...and we only get to see them for a few minutes before they blow up?

That sucks!

My hope is that the Blu-ray will feature details for each and every suit in the film!

Ya hear me Marvel Studios/Paramount/Disney?

As for the Extremis stuff, it's nice to see the SPFX from Terminator 2 used again...

Then there's this - 

IRON...F**KING...PATRIOT

I sooooo hate this armor. The good thing is, so do Tony and Rhodey. 

Rhodey is War Machine...

"Nuff said there too.

And finally, there's my gripe about the MMU's appearance in this film.

Let's see, there was:

* a lot of mention of The Avengers. This film takes place after that one. I get it. Now stop it. My head hurts from all the "over the heat hitting".

* a mention from Killian about "the big guy with the hammer falling out of the sky". 

* Rhodey in the suit, and the comments that War Machine is better than Iron Patriot. Thank you.

* a brief glimpse of the universe through Killian's cyber-interface.

* a scene from 1999 where Tony first meets Yinsen and a "Doctor Wu"...potentially the Radioactive Man in future movies.

* Killian running A.I.M. (which we never see the building of on screen).

* The Extremis stuff.

* Maya Hansen...basically the Bond chick in this film.

* One mention of S.H.I.E.L.D. from a reporter off camera.

* The "victim" of Mandarin's being a corporate officer from Roxxon.

* And the Stan Lee appearance where he's holding up the number 10.

That's it.

That's f**king IT!

No mention of Hawkeye or Black Widow.

No mention of Wasp, She-Hulk, or any other future Avengers.

In fact, after Stark's mansion is destroyed, and we see law enforcement investigating the rubble? I counted one police car and a guy wearing a C.S.I. jacket. Where the hell was S.H.I.E.L.D.?

I wouldn't expect Fury to show up...or Coulson for that matter...but how about a couple of guys in suits?

There were more agents in the middle of f**king nowhere in New Mexico dealing with the Destroyer than there were looking into a terrorist attack on Tony Stark's mansion where everyone knows the Iron Man armor is and may possibly find a piece or two to sell on the black market!!!

Never mind the fact that Tony threw his chest piece into the ocean. You know that's gonna bite him in the ass.

Joss Whendon even got a credit in this, as either a "consultant" or as a "thanks to", I can't remember, but either way, he had some say in this. So I don't understand why there wasn't more...Marvel...in it.

There was a lot of flak given over Iron Man 2 where "fans" were upset that there was too much - I don't know - Marvel in it I guess. Too many characters or some such. 

But did they have to go so far the other way in IM3?

How this film's gonna connect with Thor 2 or Cap 2 next year I have no f**king clue.

As for the very very very end of the film. It was funny. I liked it, but someone in the audience said "he looks old".

But again, that just referenced The Avengers.

Would it have killed anyone to have him say "I'm not a therapist! But I know a guy...or at least Betty does...maybe he can help you. I can make a call."

THAT would have been SO...MUCH...BETTER!